Another Due Date

Our twins from my last transfer were due today and I've been having a really... well.... 'sad' day. I'm not feeling loss or grief or even what should have been.... I'm just feeling sad, to the point of almost feeling defeated.

I'm still pretty much laid up from a series of operations, procedures and hospital stays that I have been subject to for the past 5 weeks... so not really in a good place anyway, but today has been very very difficult for me.

Until about 10 minutes ago.... Ten minutes ago I received an unexpected email from a lady who came across my blog just this evening and it moved her so much that she felt that she had to contact me.

I only wish that I could have held this lady and hugged her. Her experiences have been so similar to mine and she is very much in a similar place to me with all of this right now.

Sometimes I find it very difficult to read other people's stories because most of the time it is focused on how they now have three healthy children or some such story that is trying to give me hope and assure me that everything will work out in the end, but this just felt like the best email I could have received today, because it helps me to realise that I really am not alone in my experiences and no matter how much I am suffering..... there is always someone else who is going through something similar. I think it also helped that this lady is from Ireland as well. I receive a lot of emails from people all over the world but rarely from Irish people who are going through something similar.

I have a lot that I need to write about but I need to wait til my head is in the right place to actually write all of these things on here, but for now I really just want to say to 'Jennie', thank you so much for your email and I am very happy that you have been moved by my story and I hope that we will be able to draw some strength from eachother's stories when times are difficult in the future.xx.